Old Yellow Notepad Stories

I was cleaning and I found my old note pad with some stories I wrote in them. A while ago I tried to type them up or I did. I forgot what happened to them. I think I might have given them to my dead friend. I remember getting feedback from her about some of the stories. They flow well I guess... There are just way too many Power Ranger references. The one thing was that they were organized in chronological order. Maybe I have been fixated on chronological order for awhile. The stories aren't that long. One I typed out was about 1 paragraph long in 11 point font single spaced.

It will be good in case there are no classes available, and I get stuck taking another memoir class I'll have some prewritten stories. I was so unprepared my first time. When I think about it that would be like doing unassigned math homework before taking a math class.

Who knows these might be a jumping board to something else. These vignettes might make great 4 panel comics or something. As long as I don't feel they are mediocre then I'll be ok.

The problem is that those stories and a bunch of others I wrote on paper need to be typed out. I think I need an intern like Kramer got on Seinfeld. Which is a woman who lives in a messy house. That does not contain a chicken.

The Opposite

I don't like to say about things because I usually get really bad advice about it. When I found out it's the law in California to have a food handler card to get any job in the food industry. I want to hurt my chances for getting a job even more.

I knew if I told my parents I was thinking about getting one. With my own money. They would tell me not to do it.

I'm sticking with the opposite of things. I figure if what I mostly do is wrong and unsuccessful, then if I do the opposite it will be more successful. I did get the idea from the fictional character George Louis Costanza. I'm not doing the opposite of everything I do. Just some/most things.

My dad is so dumb he thinks I can get an office job because I type faster than him. Of course I type faster than him. He has piss poor typing skills. My typing skills are not good enough to get office jobs. It's like driving I make my dad look like a good driver because I'm a piss poor driver.

I could go for a bottle of Basketball Juice. "It has a pickle inside!".

What'd you do? Cut this out of a Magazine or Something?

The Glee prom episode was strange. Somebody older must have thought about their prom since it was only for juniors and didn't include a meal.

Why are people surprised that Jesse got kicked out of college so quickly? I know I knew when I was going to get kicked out especially when a person doesn't have the grades.

Nobody can get prom dresses for $5 even if they are used. The cheapest is probably between $20-30. If the glee club is so hated then why didn't the other students mind when they performed at the prom? Was Sue the only chaperone? Why do people act like it's a bad thing if you stag? Brittany is sometimes smarter than she seems when she tells Santana that the crown is just from a party store.

Watching the Glee prom episode made me think of the junior/senior proms I went to in my junior and senior year.

junior prom: There was some intervention from my mom and my cousin from getting me from wearing something too outrageous, saw a girl in a Jennifer Lopez knockoff dress, I wasn't really going for a 50s look but it looked like I was, I had to get an emergency cardigan because I didn't have a wrap, There were other outrageous outfits like a Mickey Mouse dress and somebody who wore costume wings.

senior prom: A lot of people made fun of my 80s inspired outfit (I really wanted a 40s inspired one), Some people weren't even dressed that fancy (mostly boys) There was live music, some girl was wearing outrageous eye makeup that rivaled that of Scary Sheri, The bathroom was really fancy, they served shrimp, they also served lamb, my friend's boyfriend ended up on the list of nominees for prom king but his girlfriend didn't, as a joke to my economics teacher (who was a Seinfeld fan) I danced the Elaine.

Each of my proms should get their own blog entry.

I was thinking of using an idea I got from watching an episode of The Monkees. Specifically the episode "The Picture Frame" where Micky gives a picture of himself as a baby to a fake movie director. I was thinking of doing something similar. I think I'll use my senior high school picture. Who would hire a baby!? Or maybe I should go and find a picture of a hot brunette and try to pass it off as myself. I just have to make sure it's not a picture of a celebrity.

I decided to be like George Costanza in "The Bizarro Jerry" episode, and take a picture from a magazine. It’s not like I need to cut it out. I just need to scan it. It just needs to be a good looking brunette female.

Fancy mustard on a Shoe

Mountain Dew Cherry Fusion I like it a lot better than code red. I didn't know if they still sold it there. I also got a Polish sandwich swimming in yellow mustard. That sandwich would taste so much better if it had Dijon mustard in it than yellow mustard. "...you know you could put that fancy mustard on a shoe and it would taste pretty good to me." -Steinbrenner in the Seinfeld episode "The Jimmy".

I saw this strange music video yesterday about people throwing things and doing trick photography. I tried it, and it doesn't work. All I got were a bunch of pictures or blurry streaks. The end of the video was weird all the people that were taking the photographs died at the end because they crashed their van. The ending reminded me a little of The Cardigans' video for "My Favourite Game".

It's Not Festivus

After I started writing my rough draft about reflecting on the class. I realized what I wrote wasn't very reflective. It sounded more like the Airing of Grievances from Festivus. You know how many words I've typed up for this assignment? Three. Three! One of the words is the title! @o@

Maybe I sound like Sue Sylvester. There were a lot of people in the class I didn't like/found annoying. I don't discriminate. That's how I "C" it. I really need my own segment on the news. :P

To quote Serena from the Dic Sailor Moon dub episode "Talk Radio". "Alright! Let's get it out!"

Jiffy Park

I'm pretty sure my days as a student are likely numbered. It's funny I feel like I did when I knew I was going to get kicked out of CSUF.

Anyway in class we were talking about Mary Kay, and the only reason I heard about it was because it was mentioned in that Seinfeld episode where Kramer gets a Mary Kay car after his is stuck in Jiffy Park. A few years after that show aired I knew a girl whose mom sold Mary Kay. Where's my dream coat and Squire's walking stick? Why do I keep referencing things that happened in Seinfeld episodes? @.@

Oh yeah ended up riding riding the bus with about literally 60-70 people. People had to get on the bus through the rear door.

I think Career Advisor finally gave up luckily they didn't call me today at all. But I'm not holding my breath yet.

Onion Rings

The title makes no sense. I'm just thinking about the onion rings I ate for dinner. :P

My dad got the time change wrong. He thinks we get an extra hour. LOL! XD Actually the only reason I remember that is because the extra hour was gained in the fall of '09. I even blogged about it. It made me think of the Seinfeld episode "The Susie" where Kramer decides to switch to daylight savings time in February. That little mnemonic device rhyme to remember never works for me at all. I need to be explicitly told which way to set my clock by like a tv news program or something.

I'm horrible under pressure and I crack. Especially when my dad is constantly badgering me. I'd be a horrible spy/agent. Sometimes he can badger me to the brink of insanity.

Don't you hate when people try to take over the conversations? I guess nobody really likes that. Here is something funny that happened in class yesterday that I totally forgot about. It didn't come to me until this afternoon. Anyway there was this discussion in class and this lady was talking, and somebody (not me) was going to chime in to agree or disagree with her I forget which it doesn't even matter anyway. She says sternly "Don't interrupt me I'm speaking!" What!? I don't know I just though that was funny. Maybe it was one of those things where you have to be there, or it was just me.

I'm getting so frustrated with the stories I'm writing for my memoir class. First I was frustrated that I wasn't cranking them out fast enough.We have to turn something in soon, and almost all of the stories I started are not finished! The ones I have finished are a half page to a page long. That's way too short! Maybe I'm too much of a perfectionist. Maybe I should be more organized or something?

Speaking of memoirs have you read Shirley's newest facebook note? Maybe I should read the book she recommends. I have to read a memoir book for class anyway and do a book report on it. I'll be all "Shirley Manson recommends". No joke I'd probably say something like that in class. I really wish Shirley would write a memoir.

Happy Festivus!

Today is Festivus. So get out your pole, air your grievances, and perform your Feats of Strength.

I'm going to watch the Senifeld episode "The Strike" today. That is the episode that popularized Festivus. Hope I don't run into denim vest, date a 2-face, or lose my atomic sub card. LOL! :P

Oh no what if I get a Human Fund card, "Money for people".

Here is a picture of an old Festivius card I made back in 8th grade. The link to the deviantart page tells the process of how I made the card.

Here's the wikipedia's take on the origins of Festivus.

I really wish I celebrated Festivus. Do you think I could take on my dad for the Feats of Strength?