Bliss

Walking into my apartment, no wait…having to unlock the door of the apartment, walking in after a successful day at work, a day that thrilled my palate with wines like Sancerre, Muscadet and Champagne. A day that let me do what I do best, talk about and explain the wines that I love the most. A day when I went for the, “trampy” look…low cut shirt, just enough to leave those silly boys, and girls for that matter, standing on their tippy toes and looking dopey when I caught them, sporting wavy pigtails, dark eye makeup, a argyle sweater and matching Vans.



A day that I felt fatty, succulent, sea kissed oysters slip down my throat, roll around in my mouth, (well, except for the one that I shot into my mouth and felt a giant hunk of shell, the yacking of that little sucker back onto the plate…well kinda killed the whole, “sex kitten” thing) marveled at how their silky textures were brought to life with a sip of Champagne, the way the bubbles danced around and made the little mollusk almost vibrate and burst with the flavor of the ocean. The way just a kiss of cocktail sauce brought out the restrained fruit in the Jasnieres, (little Loire Chenin Blanc) made the wine shed its somewhat savory exterior and expose is generous fruit and minerality. The way a touch of lemon shifted the Sancerre from grapefruit to limestone, a great day…a day full of palate exploration.

Entering the apartment and having the smell of my home, that somewhat dank, musty smell of living in a coastal community, a dusty coastal community…and years of smoking and living in a place with too many books and magazines, a smell that makes me think this is what libraries smelled like in the 50’s. Pulling off my sneakers and socks after a long day on my feet, feeling the carpet fibers slip between my toes, the rush of, “almost fall” air brush across my red toe nailed feet. No one here, no one in this space for the first time in weeks, silence. No text messages asking to meet for a drink, dinner, or “you want to some over and…” just me alone in a space that I love and rarely get to feel this intently.



Walking to the bedroom and peeling the “tramp” outfit off, slipping on my favorite, way-too-big-for-me jeans and pulling a giant white T-shirt over my still ponytailed head…still silent. Removing my glasses, watch, wedding rings…feeling unbound in almost every way, no texts, no other sounds other than my little bits of seriously relaxed air escaping my lungs.

Big jeans, red toes, no jewelry, white T-shirt, no emails, no texts, no voices…me bent over my wine fridge seeing if there was anything left, there was…3 bottles in fact. 2005 Domaine de Montille Nuits-Saint-Georges 1er Cru Clos des Grandes Vignes, 2001 Camus-Bruchon Savigny-Narbantons 1er Cru and a bottle of 2006 Dagueneau Buisson Renard…..what to do? The sound of my too big jeans dragging behind me, making that scraping sound on the fake ass tile floor in my, way too small and in need of a good washing kitchen, the way it feels to be so relaxed and have it so quiet that I could hear that sound. Feeling the muscles in my forearms tighten as I drove the corkscrew into the bottle, feeling the muscles in my biceps when I pulled that cork out. Hearing wine splash into my glass…hearing my own voice slip through my lips, an audible sigh…a sound so powerful that it felt like strong hands rubbing my back and shoulders.



The first sip of wine, in my silent house, after a long but fulfilling day at work, giant shirt gathered around me, making me feel kind of tiny, my red toed feet tucked beneath my seriously relaxed ass….bliss.

Finally checking your email to find a note, a note from someone whom you value, respect and cherish above almost any other…reading that note and reading words you have never seen so openly expressed, words of adoration, admiration and appreciation. Words of how valuable you are, words of how your mere existence in their life has changed them, for the better. Words that let you know you have touched them, are with them all the time…words you have always wanted but never really thought you might hear…amazing, a simply amazing day.